Today marks the very last day of the 2 young ones being in BPMCK as school mates, and I am very glad I have the opportunity to send them to school together and savor this moment for one last time.
The boys cannot understand what I am feeling now, nor do they realisze what I do right now, but in time they will.
In the hustle and bustle of life, we all often forget, some more than others, each step is a cherished memory, and one passed, we can never get it back.
If I have to try to explain it to someone, I will point to the film Interstellar. The part where Matthew McConaughey, after coming back from a time dilated mission of a few hours in his time, finds out that he was actually gone for decades where he came from. he reviewed all the video logs he missed, which are also reminders all the moments and milestones he missed in his daughter's life. It was absolutely devastating emotionally to view that, and I will probably not muster up the emotional courage to view that part again, unless there is good reason to.
Today is the end of an era for1 part of my kid's life, and though a large part of me knows I will miss it, the rational part of me hopes that my children will continue to be well developed and stun us with their brilliance in whatever they do.
I love you both very much, boys.
Thursday, 14 November 2019
En wanted to subsidise his own reward
So I've talked about what what En and Hong Yu got for his performance- A 1/24 scale Max-D and a 1/24 Monster Mutt Dalmation monster truck respectively.
Prior to getting it, En had changed his mind many times as to what reward he wanted, but the one he was pretty firm on was the monster truck. When he 1st saw it in mid- late Sep 2019 at West Mall, he wanted it immediately. I told him it was expensive (at 30 bucks), and it was equivalent to 10 hotwheels cars in cost, but I can get it as a reward for him (or another big toy) for his performance, despite the cost.
Since then, he had been concerned as to whether I could afford it. He kept asking me as I brought him to school if I would get it for him as a reward, whether was it expensive,and whether I have the cash to buy it. He also asked how much was $30, to which I answer it is 30 1 dollar coins. I also kept answering I will get it on the day, right after his performance, in case he changes his mind.
So, somewhere in early October, there was an introduction program to BPMCK's cousin institution, Fairfield Methodist Pr. School to help them get a little taste about what primary school life is like. Part of the program involves teaching them to know how to buy food at the canteen, and how to pay and get change back. So some money was given to him for that, and obviously he had some cash leftover, in notes and coins, including $1 coins.
So, very soon, our dear boy, probably remembering what we have conversed and doing his mental calculations, again asked me if I have enough money for the reward, to which i said yes. Despite that, he probably decided to play it safe and make sure that I am able to afford it. He actually offered me his $1 coins in his possessions, and asked me to give him my low value coins... like 10cents and 20 cents... so something like "I'll give you this $1, you give me 10cents." I have tried to reject him many time, but each time he would just say "Never mind, just take!" followed by something like " Is it enough? How many $1 coins you have already"
Of course he didnt have so many coins to give me, so he tried to solicit coins from Ah Ma or Yu Ling whenever he could... like when one of them just finished paying for something and some change was given, he would try to get them to give him the coins, especially the $1 ones
This went on til the 2nd 1/2 of Oct, as we went for the China Shanghai trip. After that, he stopped giving me the coins, though he did not stop making sure that I will honor my commitment.
Prior to getting it, En had changed his mind many times as to what reward he wanted, but the one he was pretty firm on was the monster truck. When he 1st saw it in mid- late Sep 2019 at West Mall, he wanted it immediately. I told him it was expensive (at 30 bucks), and it was equivalent to 10 hotwheels cars in cost, but I can get it as a reward for him (or another big toy) for his performance, despite the cost.
Since then, he had been concerned as to whether I could afford it. He kept asking me as I brought him to school if I would get it for him as a reward, whether was it expensive,and whether I have the cash to buy it. He also asked how much was $30, to which I answer it is 30 1 dollar coins. I also kept answering I will get it on the day, right after his performance, in case he changes his mind.
So, somewhere in early October, there was an introduction program to BPMCK's cousin institution, Fairfield Methodist Pr. School to help them get a little taste about what primary school life is like. Part of the program involves teaching them to know how to buy food at the canteen, and how to pay and get change back. So some money was given to him for that, and obviously he had some cash leftover, in notes and coins, including $1 coins.
So, very soon, our dear boy, probably remembering what we have conversed and doing his mental calculations, again asked me if I have enough money for the reward, to which i said yes. Despite that, he probably decided to play it safe and make sure that I am able to afford it. He actually offered me his $1 coins in his possessions, and asked me to give him my low value coins... like 10cents and 20 cents... so something like "I'll give you this $1, you give me 10cents." I have tried to reject him many time, but each time he would just say "Never mind, just take!" followed by something like " Is it enough? How many $1 coins you have already"
Of course he didnt have so many coins to give me, so he tried to solicit coins from Ah Ma or Yu Ling whenever he could... like when one of them just finished paying for something and some change was given, he would try to get them to give him the coins, especially the $1 ones
This went on til the 2nd 1/2 of Oct, as we went for the China Shanghai trip. After that, he stopped giving me the coins, though he did not stop making sure that I will honor my commitment.
Tuesday, 12 November 2019
Very Sick Kids: Part Deux
This piece started some time in Jan 2016, N1 just started for En, but only continued in Nov 2019
Also known as: The consequences of going to school before immune systems are up to par.
Yeah, that is true, but in the case of Didi, his ailments came from 2 sources, the 1st of which was my wife. the other, presumably, would be from EnEn, who of course got his bugs from school.
I'll talk about Yu Ling, since chronologically her ailments came 1st (though diagnosed slightly later).
So into what was since the end end of the 1st week of Jan Jan Yu Ling had been complaining about pain on her body.... which was suspected to be simple muscle strain ... alongside some rashes.. which left her wondering what she ate to trigger what seems like Eczema. Long story short, it turned out to be Shingles.... which is caused by the Varicella virus (AKA the Chicken Pox virus), and afflicts people who already had Chicken Pox before. Diagnosis was made by her company doctor on the Wed, 13th Jan 16, and she was given 3 days MC.... with medicine to cover most aspects of her ailment.
This means: People of all ages who have have not acquired chicken pox or vaccinations against it are susceptible to it. People like.... Didi.
So this means no contact for Yu Ling and Didi at all. And for good measure, no contact with En as well, even though he is immune technically.
This means I've gotta step up and sleep with Didi at night, which had been credited with giving Yu ling tired nights, which led to a depressed immune system... which led to Shingles, while Yu Ling slept in the room but away from En.
En had started school on the 5th Jan 2016, and for a while things seemed to be ok, healthwise (the clingy aspect is for another post altogether). So he went to school as usual on the 11th Jan Monday, which is of course the 1st day of the 2nd week of school. At the school entrance. temp check: passed.
So school went by and he was back home. (This part on written 3 years, almost 4 years later, where the memories have somewhat faded, the events mentioned happened, but may be out of order chronologically, or seperate and similar events consolidated into one for better flow) later he was then having a mild fever, as well as coughs.... so he had his nap, and his temps shot right up after he woke up - this was what my mother had reported to me once i got home from work... and he wasn't able to sleep well.. because, worse than what happend before just a month ago, besides high fever, En started to show signs that he was finding it hard to breath with a clogged nose, and was positively wheezing (though it took a trip to the doctor's to know what it actually was). . In fact, it was so bad that he turned into a very pale shade. Anyhow, medication was administered (paracetemol) and we just hoped it would get better.
It did not. while trying to sleep at night, En would be constantly awakened due to difficulty in breathing, and I had to also wake up and coddle him every 1/2 - 1 hour. It was excruciating... not so because I wasnt able to sleep, but having to see your own child suffering so much at such a young age really breaks my heart
Next morning, we went to the clinic, and thankfully we got priority due to En's young age. if not for that, it easily would have been more than an hour's wait instead of just 15 mins. Anyway, we got in. After describing the symptoms to the doc, and his initial examination of En's lungs via stethoscope, the Doc ordered his clinic assistant to get the Nebuliser for us to use.
So the assisstant demonstrated it to me how it is used, and I sat down in the backroom of the clinic, holding on to En, while holding the mask onto his face. At first he resisted, but I kept telling him he will feel better after this. As I was sitting alone with En, and seehim his face behind the mask, I couldn't help but feel so sorry and heart broken at what our boy had to go through at such a young age. So once we were after a few minutes, we saw the doctor again and En was examined again. Apparently the nebuliser helped, and he was breathing much better! Much less wheezing! So the doctor carriedd on to give prescriptions and arranged for us to bring the nebuliser home to administer treatment. Once before sleeping, and once right after waking up.
Thankfully, with the nebuliser, he was able to sleep much better at night and gradually over the next few days, he got progressively better.
As dor Didi, unfortunately, at the tender age of less than one, (Age one would have been when he would be taking his MMRC shot(s)), he was exposed to the Chicken pox virus from Yu Ling. So, yes, he did contract chicken pox, but basically he took it like a champ. Although sometimes uncomfortable for him, he was mostly ok throughout. leading me to conclude, that his body constitution is generally way more robust than his elder brothers. (this is further confirmed over the last 3 years, as he would generally never have the same kind of severity of sickness as compared to his elder brother, except when he contracted HFMD at age 3 in June 2018.
Before he was properly diagnosed with HFMD, he had low grade fevers, and general malaise and loss of appetite... much to all our frustration because he wasn't eating much in the 1st place! He would also complain that he had pain in his mouth, which is basically a tell tale sign of spots and ulcers in his mouth. Interestingly, those ulcers probably were very well hidden because it was only after a few days before we saw them on the upper palate, and at the same time, some mild spots resembling insect bites had appeared on his arms and legs, though we managed to catch them right before they would have been spotted the next day in school.
So quietly took him to the doctor and it was officially diagnosed so. Interestingly, any suspected case of HFMD was treated with utmost urgency at the polyclinic. They pull out all the stops, and the hell with proper process( in my opinion, it so seemed... but it was the polyclinic following established pprotocol)! We were whisked to a special waiting area, the doctor came almost immediately to examine Didi, and once confirmed, we were told to wait where we were, isolated. The nurses will collect all our prescribed medication, and we were told, we could pay at a later time. In short: Get the hell out as soon as possible! As far as i was concerned, it was record time in and out of a polyclinic!
The school never knew about this, only that he had a few days of MC
Also known as: The consequences of going to school before immune systems are up to par.
Yeah, that is true, but in the case of Didi, his ailments came from 2 sources, the 1st of which was my wife. the other, presumably, would be from EnEn, who of course got his bugs from school.
I'll talk about Yu Ling, since chronologically her ailments came 1st (though diagnosed slightly later).
So into what was since the end end of the 1st week of Jan Jan Yu Ling had been complaining about pain on her body.... which was suspected to be simple muscle strain ... alongside some rashes.. which left her wondering what she ate to trigger what seems like Eczema. Long story short, it turned out to be Shingles.... which is caused by the Varicella virus (AKA the Chicken Pox virus), and afflicts people who already had Chicken Pox before. Diagnosis was made by her company doctor on the Wed, 13th Jan 16, and she was given 3 days MC.... with medicine to cover most aspects of her ailment.
This means: People of all ages who have have not acquired chicken pox or vaccinations against it are susceptible to it. People like.... Didi.
So this means no contact for Yu Ling and Didi at all. And for good measure, no contact with En as well, even though he is immune technically.
This means I've gotta step up and sleep with Didi at night, which had been credited with giving Yu ling tired nights, which led to a depressed immune system... which led to Shingles, while Yu Ling slept in the room but away from En.
En had started school on the 5th Jan 2016, and for a while things seemed to be ok, healthwise (the clingy aspect is for another post altogether). So he went to school as usual on the 11th Jan Monday, which is of course the 1st day of the 2nd week of school. At the school entrance. temp check: passed.
So school went by and he was back home. (This part on written 3 years, almost 4 years later, where the memories have somewhat faded, the events mentioned happened, but may be out of order chronologically, or seperate and similar events consolidated into one for better flow) later he was then having a mild fever, as well as coughs.... so he had his nap, and his temps shot right up after he woke up - this was what my mother had reported to me once i got home from work... and he wasn't able to sleep well.. because, worse than what happend before just a month ago, besides high fever, En started to show signs that he was finding it hard to breath with a clogged nose, and was positively wheezing (though it took a trip to the doctor's to know what it actually was). . In fact, it was so bad that he turned into a very pale shade. Anyhow, medication was administered (paracetemol) and we just hoped it would get better.
It did not. while trying to sleep at night, En would be constantly awakened due to difficulty in breathing, and I had to also wake up and coddle him every 1/2 - 1 hour. It was excruciating... not so because I wasnt able to sleep, but having to see your own child suffering so much at such a young age really breaks my heart
Next morning, we went to the clinic, and thankfully we got priority due to En's young age. if not for that, it easily would have been more than an hour's wait instead of just 15 mins. Anyway, we got in. After describing the symptoms to the doc, and his initial examination of En's lungs via stethoscope, the Doc ordered his clinic assistant to get the Nebuliser for us to use.
So the assisstant demonstrated it to me how it is used, and I sat down in the backroom of the clinic, holding on to En, while holding the mask onto his face. At first he resisted, but I kept telling him he will feel better after this. As I was sitting alone with En, and seehim his face behind the mask, I couldn't help but feel so sorry and heart broken at what our boy had to go through at such a young age. So once we were after a few minutes, we saw the doctor again and En was examined again. Apparently the nebuliser helped, and he was breathing much better! Much less wheezing! So the doctor carriedd on to give prescriptions and arranged for us to bring the nebuliser home to administer treatment. Once before sleeping, and once right after waking up.
Thankfully, with the nebuliser, he was able to sleep much better at night and gradually over the next few days, he got progressively better.
As dor Didi, unfortunately, at the tender age of less than one, (Age one would have been when he would be taking his MMRC shot(s)), he was exposed to the Chicken pox virus from Yu Ling. So, yes, he did contract chicken pox, but basically he took it like a champ. Although sometimes uncomfortable for him, he was mostly ok throughout. leading me to conclude, that his body constitution is generally way more robust than his elder brothers. (this is further confirmed over the last 3 years, as he would generally never have the same kind of severity of sickness as compared to his elder brother, except when he contracted HFMD at age 3 in June 2018.
Before he was properly diagnosed with HFMD, he had low grade fevers, and general malaise and loss of appetite... much to all our frustration because he wasn't eating much in the 1st place! He would also complain that he had pain in his mouth, which is basically a tell tale sign of spots and ulcers in his mouth. Interestingly, those ulcers probably were very well hidden because it was only after a few days before we saw them on the upper palate, and at the same time, some mild spots resembling insect bites had appeared on his arms and legs, though we managed to catch them right before they would have been spotted the next day in school.
So quietly took him to the doctor and it was officially diagnosed so. Interestingly, any suspected case of HFMD was treated with utmost urgency at the polyclinic. They pull out all the stops, and the hell with proper process( in my opinion, it so seemed... but it was the polyclinic following established pprotocol)! We were whisked to a special waiting area, the doctor came almost immediately to examine Didi, and once confirmed, we were told to wait where we were, isolated. The nurses will collect all our prescribed medication, and we were told, we could pay at a later time. In short: Get the hell out as soon as possible! As far as i was concerned, it was record time in and out of a polyclinic!
The school never knew about this, only that he had a few days of MC
Sunday, 10 November 2019
Kindergarten End-of-year Concert and K2 Graduation
The 4-year long journey of Hong En in BPMCK is comingto an end... While Hong Yu will continue there for another 2 years til his graduation, I will miss bringing both of them to school together very much. Perhaps it is the thought of them growing up too fast, but I find myself wishing this very last week of school for 2019 would not end so fast.
Hong En has seen tremendous growth in the last 4 years... he was still very much a crybaby during the N1, and had to take weeks to settle into the new norm that was Nursery.... over the last 3 and a 1/2 years, I have never felt so wistful about the school year coming to an end.
After the end of this week, the next time I bring any of them to school will be so different. The younger one will not have his older brother with him in school, and the bigger one will have to wait for 2 years before they can go to school together again. How I wish the end of the week doesn't come so quickly. However, time stops for no one, and I will make the best of the remainder of this week, and make the last few days of bringing them to school count.
Along with Yuling, I am incredibly proud of the 2 of them. Hong En, despite having never been chosen to represent his class in any form of speech for all the 4 years, had been chosen by his Mandarin teacher to be the Mandarin valedictorian. It is a very long speech and preperations had started in July to get him to commit the whole speech into memory. He performed a flawless recital of the speech, all while my heart was pumping with such vigor that I was acutely aware that my blood pressure was probably off the scales for that duration. I was worried (unfounded, as it turns out, but one can't be sure until things have finished) the speech would get messed up for any reason, undoing months of preperation. A few days later at the PTC, both his teacjers in class gave him glowing reviews as a student and the Mandarin teacher especially praised him to be a pillar of his class, and expressed pride that she had chosen the right representative, and rarely, a make, to be the valedictorian. Like I said: We couldn't be prouder as parents.
For the younger one, he was also chosen to introduce his class for the concert item, though his was very much shorter. From what I understand from his teachers, he basically committed the speech to memory in almost no time, and was able to recite it with confidence and accuracy, so much so that the other representative, his partner, Victoria, was seeming lost when he was not around. According to his teachers, he is knowlegeable beyong his level and has shown an aptitude to learn things very quickly. Same here: We couldn't be prouder a parents.
Today, both their rewards for their efforts will arrive in the form of Monster Jam 1:24 trucks. These rewards are absolutely well deserved, and I know they will enjoy them.
Even though they did very well, that isn't the main thing really, instead, they have shown that they have tried their best, and that is worth celebrating more than the results. Like I said: I couldn't be prouder of them.
Hong En has seen tremendous growth in the last 4 years... he was still very much a crybaby during the N1, and had to take weeks to settle into the new norm that was Nursery.... over the last 3 and a 1/2 years, I have never felt so wistful about the school year coming to an end.
After the end of this week, the next time I bring any of them to school will be so different. The younger one will not have his older brother with him in school, and the bigger one will have to wait for 2 years before they can go to school together again. How I wish the end of the week doesn't come so quickly. However, time stops for no one, and I will make the best of the remainder of this week, and make the last few days of bringing them to school count.
Along with Yuling, I am incredibly proud of the 2 of them. Hong En, despite having never been chosen to represent his class in any form of speech for all the 4 years, had been chosen by his Mandarin teacher to be the Mandarin valedictorian. It is a very long speech and preperations had started in July to get him to commit the whole speech into memory. He performed a flawless recital of the speech, all while my heart was pumping with such vigor that I was acutely aware that my blood pressure was probably off the scales for that duration. I was worried (unfounded, as it turns out, but one can't be sure until things have finished) the speech would get messed up for any reason, undoing months of preperation. A few days later at the PTC, both his teacjers in class gave him glowing reviews as a student and the Mandarin teacher especially praised him to be a pillar of his class, and expressed pride that she had chosen the right representative, and rarely, a make, to be the valedictorian. Like I said: We couldn't be prouder as parents.
For the younger one, he was also chosen to introduce his class for the concert item, though his was very much shorter. From what I understand from his teachers, he basically committed the speech to memory in almost no time, and was able to recite it with confidence and accuracy, so much so that the other representative, his partner, Victoria, was seeming lost when he was not around. According to his teachers, he is knowlegeable beyong his level and has shown an aptitude to learn things very quickly. Same here: We couldn't be prouder a parents.
Today, both their rewards for their efforts will arrive in the form of Monster Jam 1:24 trucks. These rewards are absolutely well deserved, and I know they will enjoy them.
Even though they did very well, that isn't the main thing really, instead, they have shown that they have tried their best, and that is worth celebrating more than the results. Like I said: I couldn't be prouder of them.
Thursday, 25 January 2018
Desperate Parents: Forced to abandon their own flesh and blood
A piece in the NYTimes reported that a baby girl was abandoned:
The 6-month-old girl was found alone at night in a park in southern China, sleeping in a stroller. Next to her, in a lime-green backpack, was a bottle of infant formula, diapers and a two-page note from her parents.
“She’ll die if she stays with us,” it said, according to Chinese news reports. “We know this is selfish, but we have no way out.”Why did the parents do it? Apparently there were a number of reasons:
- The child was epiletic/ with disability
- The parents could not afford to continue treatment after spending all their savings on her treatment
- They believe the child would be better off with someone else.
- They believed it was the only way for the child to survive.
Obviously, there were people who are sympathetic to to the parents' plight, and people who have condemned them as well.
I'll say that although abandoning a child is undoubtly a henious act taken at face value.
Once you understand where the parents are coming from (assuming they are telling the truth, and not ones who see their daughter's health issues as an impediment for their climbing of the social mobility ladder), we can understand that this is the absolute last resort that they have.
How many of us (with children) can even entertain what it would take for us to abandon our own children, no matter how naughty they are, and to never see them again for the rest of our lives? Even with all my children's naughtiness, this is something I can never imagine myself doing. I suspect most of us too.
Thus, imagine the mental anguish and desperation the parents must have had in order to take this very last step. In their letter accompanying the abandoned child, I can imagine the tears as they wrote this:
(She) like(s) to be cuddled.... give hugs to calm her down....If you can, please talk to her and hold her little hands and feet often....she has already started eating rice porridge.....If possible, please feed her a suitable amount....
We are really thankful to you, the kind people who will be blessed your whole life. We will atone for our sins for the rest of our lives.
Indeed, they will forever be haunted by the regret of their only logical course of action. They can never look at any children the same. they will forever be reminded of their sin, but one they did out of love for their child, the kind of love that says " If you truly love some one, let them go".
For my part, the parents have my sympathies and emphathy, and I pray that God bless the child with kind and loving foster parents, grow up healthily, can hopefully help track down the parents, not for revenge, but only to tell them: "Thank you for your sacrifice so that I can have a chance at a better life"
Wednesday, 10 January 2018
So it is year 2018.... 1 year of absence from writing on this blog.
So En is in K1 this year and didi has just started N1.
En, as a 5 year old this year, has basicaly no issues going back to school, except waking up on time, but didi on the other hand, wakes up on time enthusiastically, but absolutely refuses to dress up for school after the 1st day.... and of coruse from the 3rd Jan til the 10th, have been crying each time he is forced to leave the house and just before he gets handed off to school.
So wifiy had to lave for work early, and unable to cosend them to school together with my Mom and helper, so i sent her the following texts:
[9:42 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: after you left for work, he was looking for you, and even upstairs to see if you were there. then he said 妈妈去做工了？and after he saw that en has changed, he said 我要去学校。so we were like, good!
[9:43 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: the only fuss he made during after leaving house to the busstop was who he wanted to carry him
[9:44 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: on the bus, he chanted a little bit 妈妈抱， 我要去妈妈那里， but more like questions than demands.
[9:45 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: and finally, he walked willingly into the gates, all by himself, no fuss no drama, just followed en in!
Hm... looks good. Also, it seems to me that without wifey around, didi can actually be more independent!
So En is in K1 this year and didi has just started N1.
En, as a 5 year old this year, has basicaly no issues going back to school, except waking up on time, but didi on the other hand, wakes up on time enthusiastically, but absolutely refuses to dress up for school after the 1st day.... and of coruse from the 3rd Jan til the 10th, have been crying each time he is forced to leave the house and just before he gets handed off to school.
So wifiy had to lave for work early, and unable to cosend them to school together with my Mom and helper, so i sent her the following texts:
[9:42 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: after you left for work, he was looking for you, and even upstairs to see if you were there. then he said 妈妈去做工了？and after he saw that en has changed, he said 我要去学校。so we were like, good!
[9:43 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: the only fuss he made during after leaving house to the busstop was who he wanted to carry him
[9:44 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: on the bus, he chanted a little bit 妈妈抱， 我要去妈妈那里， but more like questions than demands.
[9:45 AM, 1/11/2018] +65 9025 4602: and finally, he walked willingly into the gates, all by himself, no fuss no drama, just followed en in!
Hm... looks good. Also, it seems to me that without wifey around, didi can actually be more independent!
Thursday, 13 October 2016
What it means to be a Man
Mostly lifted from http://www.upworthy.com/a-dad-explained-trumps-words-to-his-sons-and-made-a-powerful-point-about-masculinity?c=ufb1 by Derek Steele
"Men at times talk like that." — Rudy Giuliani, defending Trump boasting about sexual assault as "locker-room talk"
Hong En and Hong Yu:
Fortunately right now you are too young to be exposed to or interested in political discourse. And you are much too young to have Facebook accounts. But I imagine there will be a time in the not too distant future when you are on Facebook and we'll be friends. I also imagine that at some point after that whether out of boredom or interest you'll look back through your old man's posts for some funny stories and maybe some tidbits of wisdom — so I'll leave this right here for you.
Men do not, at times, talk like that. Sure some individuals with an X and Y chromosome like you may say something like that, but we do not call them Men. We call them perverts, abusers, or rapists — not Men. Real Men don't do that and wouldn't even think to say that.
You will hear a lot of people tell you what Men do or what it takes to 'be a Man'. The vast majority of it will be total garbage. If you want to be a Man, forget about machoism or sexual conquest. Being a Man is not about that. It's about protecting those around you who are weak or innocent — maybe a child being bullied or your own children. It's being awake at all hours of the night to warm a bottle, change a diaper, change the sheets on a wet bed or even worse. Men get puked on, pooped on, bled on and cried on. It's about being open with someone, vulnerable and accountable. It's admitting your mistakes and failures — in all its ugliness — and seeking forgiveness, over and over and over again. Real Men play dress up and enjoy tea parties and will make a complete fool out of themselves just to hear a child laugh. They cry, even weep, when the situation calls for it. They respect, honor and cherish women because all of them are human — created in the image of the Creator.
It's tough being a Man. Hardest work you'll ever do. So when someone tries to justify abhorrent words and behavior by sullying your good reputation as a Man — be angry and speak up. Don't let them define you down by their conduct. In short — be a Man.
Sincerely,
Your Dad
"Men at times talk like that." — Rudy Giuliani, defending Trump boasting about sexual assault as "locker-room talk"
Hong En and Hong Yu:
Fortunately right now you are too young to be exposed to or interested in political discourse. And you are much too young to have Facebook accounts. But I imagine there will be a time in the not too distant future when you are on Facebook and we'll be friends. I also imagine that at some point after that whether out of boredom or interest you'll look back through your old man's posts for some funny stories and maybe some tidbits of wisdom — so I'll leave this right here for you.
Men do not, at times, talk like that. Sure some individuals with an X and Y chromosome like you may say something like that, but we do not call them Men. We call them perverts, abusers, or rapists — not Men. Real Men don't do that and wouldn't even think to say that.
You will hear a lot of people tell you what Men do or what it takes to 'be a Man'. The vast majority of it will be total garbage. If you want to be a Man, forget about machoism or sexual conquest. Being a Man is not about that. It's about protecting those around you who are weak or innocent — maybe a child being bullied or your own children. It's being awake at all hours of the night to warm a bottle, change a diaper, change the sheets on a wet bed or even worse. Men get puked on, pooped on, bled on and cried on. It's about being open with someone, vulnerable and accountable. It's admitting your mistakes and failures — in all its ugliness — and seeking forgiveness, over and over and over again. Real Men play dress up and enjoy tea parties and will make a complete fool out of themselves just to hear a child laugh. They cry, even weep, when the situation calls for it. They respect, honor and cherish women because all of them are human — created in the image of the Creator.
It's tough being a Man. Hardest work you'll ever do. So when someone tries to justify abhorrent words and behavior by sullying your good reputation as a Man — be angry and speak up. Don't let them define you down by their conduct. In short — be a Man.
Sincerely,
Your Dad
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)